Rozamund lives opposite the local primary school, and thought nothing of hanging her lacy black intimates out to dry on her washing line.
But clearly someone had a problem with the not-so-naughty knickers, as, to Rozamund’s dismay, the undies were whipped off the line and posted through her letterbox with an angry note.
“It is total[ly] inappropriate for this type of garment to be displayed opposite the village primary school,” the anonymous resident wrote.
“There are members of this community that would welcome a halting of this. Thank you.”
65-year-old Rozamund, who lives alone, insists the washing line where she hangs her smalls is in a small yard closed off by a farm gate.
And this isn’t the first time Rozamund has been the subject of undercracker controversy: around ten years ago the local parish council met to discuss the grandmother’s underwear, after all of her knickers were stolen.
Rozamund’s daughter, Charlotte Wilkinson, took to Facebook to express her shock and disbelief at the “prudish” resident of the village who wrote the note to Rozamund.
“Feeling shocked,” she wrote, “Seriously the small-minded prudishness of this village is unbelievable. My mum found this note and her knickers posted through the door this morning.”
“I didn’t know there was a law against hanging your knickers on the line?”
Facebook commenters were quick to jump to the family’s defense, pointing out that whoever posted the pants “saw [the underwear] from a distance, climbed into private property, took them without consent, and wrote that [note]. Loving that the village has pant patrol.”
The parish council deny ever discussing Rozamund’s undies in an official meeting, and are looking into the bizarre row now dividing the town, dubbed “knicker-gate”.
Meanwhile the people of the Internet have rallied following Charlotte’s Facebook post, sending Rozamund new underwear in the post and even considering buying enough knickers to make some bunting.
Oh, England, never change.